Little Yeshiva Girl...

Monday, July 9, 2007
It's been a week since I last wrote anything according to the calendar; it has been a whole new lifetime in so many other dimensions. Six days ago I walked into the yeshiva a brand new student. Do you recall your first day at school? For kindergarten, for high school, for college, for grad school, there were similar feelings for me last Sunday. But I am here to learn and nothing was going to stand in my way and nothing did. The other students are amazing and I have so much to learn from them and their lives. We engage in discussions about text and life without thinking that we just met. The days are rather long: shacharit, ulpan, lunch, mincha, study, dinner, homework. Ok, really long. And I'm exhausted. And I love it. I'm still not really sleeping--that can be done in another lifetime. The texts the rabbis are providing are intentionally provocative and yet accessible. Simultaneously, they are applicable to the wide range of student backgrounds which exist. I am fully aware that I don't fully grasp anything we are talking about and dissecting. All the paperwork they are handing out goes straight into a folder because it will take time and reflection to really try and understand everything that is contained within those words. From ulpan, from textual study, from talking on the street, my Hebrew is improving by leaps and bound every day. I still feel like a complete idiot when I order something at the bakery (takes me like 30sec to get a potato bureka). The one across from the yeshiva staffs people who are very understanding and patient; the same can't be said for other customers, and who can blame them?! Ani rotza shelosh kokie shokolad. I then reward myself by eating one of the newly purchased chocolate cookies.
I have not settled into a routine and I don't think I will. It still hasn't occurred to my social life that I am in school, and I'm okay with that. I'm getting along great with my new roommate--Elisha. I'll be there until Aug 9, when yeshiva ends and his lease runs out (just good timing). I haven't fully decided what I will do my last week here. I'd like to go to the Dead Sea. However, something about 44C, 100% humidity, $50, 6hr round trip bus ride, really makes the whole experience unappealing. Tel Aviv does nothing for me, in fact it is rather a deterrent to the Israel trip and something to be tolerated rather than sought after. The north is an idea and a possibility. I think watching the meteor showers from the hills of Tzfat or the shores of Tiverias on Aug 12 could be something for the memory books.
I don't believe I ever concluded the tallit story, so here I go. Ten minutes before the shop was to close I walked in, and didn't even need to see it to know it was still there. The sales lady saw me drooling (no really, I think I made a puddle on the floor) and asked if I wanted to try it on and I had to say no, not just yet. I knew how much it would cost financially, I also knew the return would far surpass that. I said I would return the next day with reinforcements. They were skeptical, but there I was, just before lunch time. Dekel was with me and then I put it on. The way she says it happened was that it found me, not the other way around. I was transformed when I had it wrapped over me. I cannot describe the feeling, the sensation, you'll just have to see it with me. I was able to personalize it though with my names: Ilanah and Rachael. I also purchased a kippah to match and that will be a new experience. The weaver told me it would take him about 40 days to make it. Now I realize that time includes other orders, but actual time spent on a single tallit is over 2wks with one person working on it full time. No way to convey what it will mean to me to wear it.
I am getting help learning my torah portion for Rosh HaShannah from several rabbis. Not because I asked but because they offered. I am learning it in order to own it, the musical notes are just icing. That feels tremendously different than what I did last year.
To clear up any thoughts, I want to say I am having an unbelievable time here. And yes, truthfully, I cannot imagine what it is going to be like when I am not here and instead back in Boulder. Only time will tell how life-changing this "vacation" will be. Having said that, I cannot wait to give everyone a hug (and chase after little Noah!). Hope all is well and I'll see you sooner than we all realize.